The Unconventional Love Story That is Life

What is love? Is it a definite thing or, some obscure metaphorical concept that's really beyond human thought? I believe that it is, it's a feeling most people can't explain, it exists in so many different forms, it is obscure at its very core. Love is everything and it is nothing, how can someone perfectly describe love into one succinct definition? I don't think it's possible. It's the one emotion in this world that is without logic, it is completely enveloped in emotion and sealed with an act more personal than life itself. It is bearing your soul to another person, every single facet and curve of your being is known to the partner you choose. I don't think anyone will ever define love because for every person it means something different.

My parents met in 7th grade homeroom at Bayshore Middle School, Peterson came right before Quisenberry. Now I wasn't there (obviously) but from the stories I've heard it wasn't love at first sight, at least not for all parties involved. My mother was band geek, she played the Clarinet among other instruments in the school's marching band and my father was a baseball jock. They came from totally different worlds but, from the moment my mom set eyes on my dad she saw something she liked. 

Their worlds although existed in close proximity were very different. My father grew up pretty much with a single mother, his father being in the Coast Guard was not around very often and eventually passed away after sustaining a head injury while working on a roof in Kentucky. My dad was 10 when he became fatherless, he has 5 other brothers and sisters. They were all pretty close in age and they kept up with each other while my grandmother worked at the phone company, she was actually one of the first female operators in Manatee County. My dad like his brothers was very involved in sports, all of them grew up going to the Manatee County Boys Club where they played every sport known to man, football, baseball, basketball, etc. 

My mom on the other hand was a military brat. After being born in Wisconsin her family moved more then a couple of times. First to Germany, then Colorado, followed by Virginia and finally  at the end of sixth grade my grandfather retired from the Air Force and moved his family (my mother and her twin brothers) to Bradenton, Florida. My mother's family although not rich were quite comfortable in comparison to my dad's family. 

Once in high school both of my parents in a way followed the path that was paved by their sibling predecessors. My father playing on many of the sports teams like his older brother and my mother joined the band like her brothers before her. And so the typical high school hierarchy began.

My parents never dated in high school although they did go on one date. For Senior Homecoming my mom was the band representative and she asked my dad to escort her. If I could say one thing about my dad I would have to emphasize he is not the most romantic of people but, he's clueless to this so I suppose one can't miss what they don't know they are missing. He escorted her and I think they went out for pizza afterwards. Some months later my mom asked my dad again to the Ma'amzelles Dance (basically the Sadie Hawkins Dance of the 70s) but my father, like a jerk declined. He had actually heard through the grape vine that another girl was going to ask him but, karma being the lovely lady that she is dealt him a rather disappointing hand when the girl ended up not asking him.

So from this point on my mother lost faith in her crush on my dad and my existence was slowly fading into nothing but, don't lose faith. After attending Manatee Community College they both went on to their respective alma maters, my dad went to UF and my mom headed up to Tallahassee to yet again join the marching band. Eventually after they both graduated college they actually ended up in the same town Jacksonville, the beautiful city on the St. Johns.

Like old times my mom was the initiator, she heard my dad was living in Jax and decided to look him up. They went on a movie date, now I've only heard this part of the story once so forgive me if I'm wrong but, I do recall my mother telling me it really wasn't that great of a date and it took my dad weeks to call her back (I think he lost her number for awhile) until he invited her to his Halloween party. She and her roommate Karen attended, when they finally arrived my mom happened on an inebriated version of my father, who was dressed up as an African American hooker for Halloween...Yes, like you guys I'm also wondering how they ended up getting married at this point.

My parents at their wedding in 1989

In some way shape or form my parents kept going on dates and eventually became boyfriend and girlfriend, which eventually turned into an engagement (I'm not even going to tell you the proposal story because it's really anti-climactic) which like most engagements, although not all, turned into a big white wedding. Completed only by my father's white tux and my mom's Princess Di inspired dress.

Telling the story without all the details is so much more romantic then the reality but, that was my parents relationship. I think it proves my point that love is undefinable. It started with two people who were very different from each other. It started at two totally different paces, my mother knew from the beginning and held that torch for years even when most girls would have given up. My dad on the other hand was quite slow in realizing his feelings and didn't notice my mother's beauty and grace until much later. 

People grow at different rates, they feel on different levels, and sometimes they exist in different worlds but from this we can gather that anything is possible. Love has a way of resurfacing, it has a way of awakening memories and feelings within us that we thought we had rid ourselves of. 

My parents had a love story, even if it defies all typical romantic constraints, and you and me, we'll have one too. It might not be like another persons, in fact it probably won't be anything like the people you know, it probably won't be anything like you imagined, but in the end it will happen.

I've never been in love but, that's okay, because I'm willing to wait for that one person. That one person that is perfect, perfect for me. Who knows I'm probably being a little naive but love will happen when I'm ready. Love will happen when it's supposed to, so to all of you out there like me who only have an idea of love, don't get discouraged. It's out there waiting, let it come to you, you're less likely to kiss a frog that way.

Much love,

     -Leah Q.